Paul Foreman’s dad Denny is becoming a regular visitor to 19a Rosamund Street. With Denny having been absent from his son’s life for so many years, the pair make up for lost time by discussing the important issue of Jackie Chan’s cinematic oeuvre. Denny’s position is that it’s too easy to criticise the Hong Kong action-auteur’s later work, such as Rush Hour, but Paul points out that Rush Hour isn’t exactly a recent film. A quick bit of Googling by Billy reveals it was made in 1998. Paul’s faith in Chan’s early period is unwavering, and he suggests digging out his DVD of The Legend Of Drunken Master to prove his point. When the off-duty Archdeacon mentions a recently widowed parishioner called Mr Finnegan, Denny sees this as an opportunity to have Paul to himself. ‘Mr Finnegan, begin again,’ he says, crassly referencing the folk song of unknown origin. With Billy despatched, Paul starts planning the Chanfest in earnest, with highlights including Dragons Forever and the first three Police Story films.
Steve McDonald is convinced his attempts at dating are doomed to failure, until an unexpected text lifts his spirits. He asks his daughter Amy Barlow to guess who it’s from. After her unhelpful ‘Penelope Cruz?’ response, he reveals the message was sent by Demi from his dating app. Back at Chanfest, Denny suggests getting some ice cream to further improve the chop-socky binge. ‘Are you sure we won’t have Mary Whitehouse on our case?’ checks Denny, likening Billy to the self-appointed guardian of moral values who founded the National Viewers’ And Listeners’ Association in 1965.
Gemma Winter-Brown’s children are eating at Roy’s Rolls. One of them has an Action Man, a toy that will celebrate its 60th anniversary in 2026. And in keeping with this episode’s combat-leaning theme, Liam Connor is attending a Jeet Kune Do class at the Community Centre. At The Rovers, Tim Metcalfe tells his wife Sally that he’s finding it very difficult keeping his distance from Steve. He regards them as an inseparable pair, like Morecambe And Wise. Or the former Barcelona midfield duo Xavi Hernandez and Andres Iniesta (lookalike Tim would have to be the latter).
When Amy says she intends to use her student radio show to unearth information about Lauren Bolton, Nina Lucas compares her to Radio 2 mainstay Sara Cox. Meanwhile, Bernie Winter is nostalgically sifting through the contents of her keep-forever box. She wonders who once commented on the potency of cheap music (it was Noel Coward), because the treasured keepsakes are having a similar impact on her emotions. Those emotions are taken to even greater extremes when she discovers Paul is on his way to Weatherfield General. He struggled to breathe after Denny left him alone in the flat. If the Community Centre’s Jeet Kune Do class needs someone to practise moves on, Paul’s dickhead dad would be perfectly suited for the job. They could even get Jackie Chan in to show them some moves.
Steve and Demi Mansfield’s first date is going well at The Rovers. When pressed to list the guests at her dream dinner party, she chooses Steve Coogan, Self Esteem, Bjork and The Dagenham Girl Pipers. The aforementioned Morecambe And Wise frequently referred to the bagpipe-playing marching band, who were formed in 1930 and still exist as a legacy act. It’s a safe bet that Steve wouldn’t get an invite to Sally’s dream dinner party. When she spots him with Demi, she’s appalled that he’s wearing jeans on a first date. ‘No-frills Casanova’ is her withering assessment of his worth.
When Denny finally turns up at the hospital, he’s met with a torrent of abuse from Paul’s nearest and dearest. His levels of remorse and responsibility are about as low as those of a Post Office executive at the Horizon Inquiry, so he reacts to Bernie’s criticism by calling her ‘Hyacinth Bucket’. Like that social-climbing sitcom snob, Denny shows total dedication to keeping up appearances – in his case, the appearance of being a scumbag. Back at The Rovers, Sally (no stranger to a bit of social climbing herself) complains to Sean Tully that the wine he’s served her isn’t the Pinot Grigio she asked for. In his defence, he points out she isn’t Jennifer Coolidge from The White Lotus.
Alya Nazir tells Dee-Dee Bailey her new boss Rich Pemberton walked in while she was kissing Adam Barlow. Now she fears her move to Dublin might be cancelled, but Dee-Dee thinks Rich is just making her sweat. ‘That man could make Prince Andrew sweat,’ admits Alya. She yearns to see the sights of Dublin, like St Stephen’s Green and Trinity College. But does it have a Pizza Express as iconic as the one in Woking? Over a homemade Italian meal, Liam tells his mum Maria Connor that Joseph Brown has invited him to watch a Jackie Chan DVD from his Uncle Paul’s collection. Joseph hopes Liam will be inspired to take more of an interest in his martial arts classes, but the troubled teen is more focused on fighting his personal demons.
Coronation Street episode 11256/11257. Originally aired 3rd May 2024.
